[ When was the last time he ate? Genya isn't even sure anymore, memory after the battle a big blur melding into a little blur of slow-fast moving time and staring at the ceiling. At least he isn't actually very hungry; it's just a matter of realizing he should eat.
But, he doesn't feel good about sending Tokito-san out to get it when he's also feeling like shit. So, clearing his throat, ]
[Having mentioned procuring a meal reminds him that he hasn't eaten in some time, before he wandered into that forest, how many days have passed since he laid within these walls. Closing his eyes. Ignoring all needs. Now there's an empty feeling. And stomach churns. He brings a hand over it. Water did fill him but not enough to satisfy hunger.
This only temporarily abated the rumbling in his belly.]
It's been some time since I've had a meal. If it's the same for you—
[The almost empty bottled is passed back through the gap in the wall before he rises to his feet. Still keep himself steady against the wall.] I'll return soon.
[ Genya takes the bottle back, giving the final little bit a swig to finish it off before tossing it toward the trash can. ]
Yeah, it's been a while. Can't really remember ... it's all kind of a blur since we fought that spirit.
[ With a sigh, the younger Shinazugawa scrubs his face, willing himself to gather strength and get up off his ass. He's not so weak (doesn't want to be so weak) as to send Tokito-san alone. ]
I'll go with you. [ stubbornly, Genya pushes himself to his feet too, ] It's probably a good idea to move, right?
[ Even if he's already sweating from pushing himself up, it does feel good to actually stretch his limbs after being prone for a few days. As annoying as this all is ... at least it's healing. ]
[A blur, closing of eyes, unable to tell time easily when sleep was so overpowering on weary bodies. His bones ache. His leg felt stiff. Right at the thigh. Not just his injury but he could see that blood had dried into a crust on the legs of his pants. His outward appearance matching just how he felt. Truly he did feel as Genya put it like shit. But he did manage to stay up right, even if his breathing was heavier with effort.
A cold sweat over his brow is quickly wiped. His hair pushed away before he forces his body to peel away from the wall and already it protests. His eyes half close. The first step the hardest when he almost ends up on his knees. Even so he makes himself move. That's all he could do. Towards the door and only then does his mind reminds him of what was said.]
If your injuries aren't too extensive. If not rest.
[But as is he can't very well force Genya to follow instructions. He had no authority.]
[ Honestly: good question. They had been pretty bad after the fight, but now, his bandages are brown with dried blood. Curious, Genya pats down his side—that's where the worst of it had been, where the flowers had been torn from his bones and flesh. It hurts, but it doesn't feel quite so painfully raw.
He heals quickly. That's one of the things that changed when he started eating demons; some of their cells remain, changing him slowly. He isn't one, but his body isn't quite the same anymore. ]
M'alright. [ a gruff response as he clomps toward the front door and pries it open, dragging his ass into the hall. ] Probably look worse than I feel.
[ Yeah, he looks like shit, and clearly needs a bath. ]
[To be fair. So did Muichiro. Blood, sweat. All that didn't go well with his loose uniform nor long hair. Even running a hand through it he found it knotted, limp and greasy enough that his expression fell. They were both an awful sight. It takes him a moment to make past the front door of his room. He doesn't look directly at the other teen. Not yet anyway.
If he is pushing himself into movement. There is a chance so that the younger Shinazugawa. There's a thought to that man, to the other pillars, and those within the corps. He never did ask Tanjiro what happened after he was gone.]
Have you managed to making any earnings. I've been mostly using what was on me.
[ Wow ... they're a couple of stinky, dirty boys. Heading to the bath house for a soak might do them so good, as soon as they're able to drag their butts there and not pass out on the way. ]
Yeah, I have some. [ he did some quests before all this shit happened ... some 'just in case' money. this feels like a 'just in case' situation. ] Hold on.
[ Rummaging around his pockets, Genya pulls a few gold coins into his palm. Enough to get a couple of supplies to share between them; it's not like he's saving them for anything else anyway. ]
This should be enough. They also take favors, even if I like that less.
[ Owing demons favors ... it's laughable, even if this whole situation is kind of laughable. ]
[he inquired out of worry not expecting genya to make pull out cash and switching things up on him. muichiro wasn’t about to let the older boy cover the meals. he made the invitation he would pay. there is no feeling he is being unnecessarily stubborn. in this situation he should cover costs, especially when he could.
the gold coins are regarded briefly before his small, worn (but childlike hand) closes genus’s around the offered payment. a slow shake of his head follows. his gaze upwards meeting genya’s eyes.] I’ll pay. Save this for another time. Who knows what’s to come. We may need their currency then.
[after a moment a smile is worn. strained and yet open, friendly. his hand is pulled back. if he’s in pain it no longer shows in his movements as he motions for genya to follow.]
[ While he doesn't argue (Muichiro may consider himself retired since he died and all, but Genya still holds him in respect), Genya fully intends to pay if he catches a moment for it. What else are the coins for, if not a moment like this?
But he stays quiet, following after the younger boy, hands in his pockets as he walks so he can dig his nails into his palms whenever one of those wounds throbs too much. ]
Tch ... and I bet whatever comes next will be worse than this. Must be the reason why we've been dragged here.
[ Picking up the pace, he falls into step beside Muichiro, ]
[some sort of endless cycle of suffering? he muses over the idea but he isn't sure if it's all that simple. although he doesn't doubt that there will be more difficulties ahead of them. but they had to all tie to some purpose. to the fact that they didn't have their bodies all to themselves. a reason. there had to be. could these creatures —
a quick glance is given to the other boy, a slight tilt of his head in consideration. should he? well the answer wasn't simple.]
In a way. Sometimes. I try to ignore it. But it is very persistent. That leech knows that I would — [he stops there because telling his companion of his own ideas of what he should do if he loses himself again probably wouldn't lead to any pleasant conversation. it could even get to tanjiro. this was a conversation saved to have with the insect pillar.] get rid of it if I could.
[ There's hesitation there, Genya can sense it, but it doesn't really bother him. Though they're close in age, they aren't truly peers. Muichiro is a pillar, someone far stronger than he, despite how badly Genya might want to reach that level for the sake of meeting his brother again.
Curious as he is, the young Shinazugawa doesn't press. Just grunts his agreement and nods, adjusting to the rhythm of walking again and shaking off the pangs of pain that come with it. ]
Mine's just anxious all the time. It just keeps telling me there's danger.
[A quick speed is kept up in his steps. While he may not have the same consideration for himself if he was more attuned to his surroundings, if he considered the boy accompanied him a little more then he would realize he should slow down. He was causing him pain but while he could ignore his own he'd feel some guilt. But annoyance and anger has a way of distracting him. He would really be rid of the cat one way or another — and it is perfectly aware of that.
He hears Genya. Anxious? About? There's a fleeting thought: if it made Genya's constitution any different. There's a strange curiosity that led him to believe he would like to get closer. Maybe. See just — wait no that's not. He knows what that is. It's not his own thoughts. Not him wanting a taste of the sea.]
I'll get warnings once in a while. But it's pushing for some partnership.
[ Wow. Wow. Wow, Tokito-san. He isn't a snack?! Well, he is a snack, but not that kind of snack. The fish in his mask is going to get traumatized from all of these cat youkai trying to eat him.
But Genya remains blissfully unaware of such things. ]
Partnership? Really?
[ Huh. Though his own youkai seems to be doing the same, it's still a little surprisingly hear. Neither of them are used to such things; demons are always looking to trick. ]
Guess that explains why they live in masks. They need help.
[And that did not make Muichiro anymore sympathetic to their plight. He still thought these things as nothing more than opportunistic parasites; the ones inhabiting the masks. Logically he knows this is different. There were times he had stopped people from confronting the youkai but those weren't tied to his existence and he thought them harmless.
But this thing?
He keeps walking. Steady. Pain ignored but he almost feels like speaking. Telling Genya. There's something important. But maybe now it would just make things more tense. But did the taller boy know? Did he knows those creatures could take control?]
This is frustrating. I've been thinking about what I should. I want to help but — what am I even?
... They could'a asked first, you know? Instead of just latching on like this.
[ Genya isn't sure he wants to help, to be honest. There's so much back home he'd been working toward, namely getting stronger and finally being able to meet his brother properly. Here? He just feels stunted, trapped within a cycle, and caught up in a problem he doesn't truly understand.
The Forest Shrine had assured him of that. What happened here? Why? They're questions that don't have answers, least of all the reason why he should help some youkai that just decided to hop on board.
Glancing at the other boy, ]
What do you mean?
[ "What am I even"? Pls don't tell him they're zombies now that they're housing these youkai. ]
[Yes. It was true. They certainly could have asked. However, would either of them have agreed to share their existence with such creatures? Would anyone have accepted such terms? He doesn't believe so. Most people would not be so willing and ready to give up part of themselves, their autonomy, to beings akin to demons. Now more than ever he knows his own faux longevity is one he would easily relinquish in order to put things in order but that wasn't viable currently. He had to help in whatever way he could while he was reanimated.
But that did not change the fact that his wasn't sure of the stability of his life. He wasn't bothered by the thought of death. Why should he be? Yet there is no denying the chill that shakes his small frame, unwillingness to repeat the experience or his body protesting? He wants to think it the latter. It's more favorable than the thought of cowardice.]
Before I arrived here, I already experienced death, yet now I find my body whole. I am warm. I can breathe, my heart beats. When I'm wounded I hurt. I'm alive when I shouldn't be. Aside from what I am. What awaits me in the future? And you for that matter. And everyone if there are those who already passed among those who haven't.
Already experienced death. He doesn't remember hearing about the pillar dying, but also knows that Tokito-san isn't one to lie. And that extra blow—and you. Genya's steps slow for only a moment before he continues on, trudging through the ache with eyes set straight ahead.
Tanjiro had hinted at it. That's all he had needed to do, giving the reassuring words that Sanemi was okay. So, outside of the initial shock, the older boy finds himself ... strangely okay with the strangeness of it all. His apparent death, Tokito-san's apparent death, being here. ]
Are we really sure this isn't the afterlife?
[ With some kind guise from the gods, letting them pretend they're living again, with some kind of duty to attend to? ]
Or some kind of place between the living and the dead. Considering ... y'know.
[A noncommittal is all Muichiro can muster in this situation.
He doesn't comprehend what sort of land this is. He doesn't even have an inkling of a clue or suspicion to offer to Genya. After all the youkai, the structures, and the over all technology around them was unfamiliar in a sense. Sure, they may have heard about such creatures in stories by they weren't ever given physical lives. It was as much as their own reality when it came to demons. In their own world people did not know of their existence and they remained nothing more than stories or myths. So then what could this mean?
Reality here was not the one they were acquainted with. He wants to come to some kind of answer, find a conclusion. One he can offer the taller boy, a worthy response that offered some reassurance. But he had nothing.]
I can't say for sure. Or ever why we were the ones brought here.
[More thought given. If they were to give their aid to the people here, even the creatures of this land, or if they were being forced to work with them then surely there were others that were better suited to the task. For if strength is required, maturity, then Muichiro is sure among pillars he is probably one of the weakest. His body was small, young, not fully developed. Though often he was called talented, he didn't have the experience or calming aura men like Himejima-san possessed. Even the elder Shinazugawa might make more of a difference than someone with such small hands as he.]
[ Right. Of course Tokito-san doesn't know. The pillars might be the epitome of strength in Genya's eyes, but they're still human. Just as he had been brought here, they're both just making best guesses—frustrating enough for Genya to want to throw a tantrum, but he's mostly outgrown doing that outwardly. So he'll just. Y'know. Imagine doing it while biting back all that frustration about their situation and how strange it is.
Eyes ahead, he studies the outline of the 7-11 in the distance. ]
... Yeah. I can't imagine why they would pick me over my brother if they had the choice.
[ Sanemi is strong, smart, quick. Everything Genya isn't despite efforts and training under Himejima-san. Sure, they might have been cautious of how Sanemi would respond to youkai, but his brother isn't a cruel man. Only to demons, which these youkai aren't ... necessarily. Oni are still around, but even they're not quite the same.
Shortly, Genya nods. ]
... I guess we'll wait and see. [ he shrugs, trying to work out some of the ache, ] Because the afterlife can't hurt this much, right?
[As Genya speaks Muichiro's teal gaze fixates on him, or perhaps he is imagining the other Shinazugawa here for an instance. A mangey wolf scratching and biting at itself in futile attempts to be rid of a parasite. That's right. Somehow he cannot see that man amicably accepting to be host of some other creature. Not that he means any offense. He wasn't any better. He could not accept this. And slowly he raises a hand to look at his own open palm. That thing — he can't shake the feeling it is off.
It's keen interest in certain people, fascination with some scents, and he was sure it hadn't acted all too kindly. It was impossible, and yet, maybe it was right that he didn't have much of a choice but to work with it.]
I'll admit I don't feel suited for this.
It's difficult. And without breathing styles I am not as physically strong after all I am still young and small.
[Right. It's not like there is any other choice aside from that.] It's kind of strange to be able to feel again and to be whole and just being able to exist. I really thought I was moving on. Now I am not even sure if I truly saw what was on the other side.
[ It's a little weird to hear a hashira admit to his own flaws, but Genya knows it's the truth. Tokito-san is slight, a child still growing into his own, yet to hit the growth spurt that put Genya at nearly six feet tall. Almost as weird as hearing that he died, but they're both oddities that the younger Shinazagawa is beginning to take in stride.
Necessary, given everything that's going on. Getting bogged down at this rate will leave him in over his head.
Maybe he shouldn't ask. It's none of his business, it's not as though they're particularly close, but the words slip out anyway, quietly, ]
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[ When was the last time he ate? Genya isn't even sure anymore, memory after the battle a big blur melding into a little blur of slow-fast moving time and staring at the ceiling. At least he isn't actually very hungry; it's just a matter of realizing he should eat.
But, he doesn't feel good about sending Tokito-san out to get it when he's also feeling like shit. So, clearing his throat, ]
Whenever is fine. You don't have to do it now.
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This only temporarily abated the rumbling in his belly.]
It's been some time since I've had a meal. If it's the same for you—
[The almost empty bottled is passed back through the gap in the wall before he rises to his feet. Still keep himself steady against the wall.] I'll return soon.
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Yeah, it's been a while. Can't really remember ... it's all kind of a blur since we fought that spirit.
[ With a sigh, the younger Shinazugawa scrubs his face, willing himself to gather strength and get up off his ass. He's not so weak (doesn't want to be so weak) as to send Tokito-san alone. ]
I'll go with you. [ stubbornly, Genya pushes himself to his feet too, ] It's probably a good idea to move, right?
[ Even if he's already sweating from pushing himself up, it does feel good to actually stretch his limbs after being prone for a few days. As annoying as this all is ... at least it's healing. ]
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A cold sweat over his brow is quickly wiped. His hair pushed away before he forces his body to peel away from the wall and already it protests. His eyes half close. The first step the hardest when he almost ends up on his knees. Even so he makes himself move. That's all he could do. Towards the door and only then does his mind reminds him of what was said.]
If your injuries aren't too extensive. If not rest.
[But as is he can't very well force Genya to follow instructions. He had no authority.]
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He heals quickly. That's one of the things that changed when he started eating demons; some of their cells remain, changing him slowly. He isn't one, but his body isn't quite the same anymore. ]
M'alright. [ a gruff response as he clomps toward the front door and pries it open, dragging his ass into the hall. ] Probably look worse than I feel.
[ Yeah, he looks like shit, and clearly needs a bath. ]
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If he is pushing himself into movement. There is a chance so that the younger Shinazugawa. There's a thought to that man, to the other pillars, and those within the corps. He never did ask Tanjiro what happened after he was gone.]
Have you managed to making any earnings. I've been mostly using what was on me.
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Yeah, I have some. [ he did some quests before all this shit happened ... some 'just in case' money. this feels like a 'just in case' situation. ] Hold on.
[ Rummaging around his pockets, Genya pulls a few gold coins into his palm. Enough to get a couple of supplies to share between them; it's not like he's saving them for anything else anyway. ]
This should be enough. They also take favors, even if I like that less.
[ Owing demons favors ... it's laughable, even if this whole situation is kind of laughable. ]
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the gold coins are regarded briefly before his small, worn (but childlike hand) closes genus’s around the offered payment. a slow shake of his head follows. his gaze upwards meeting genya’s eyes.] I’ll pay. Save this for another time. Who knows what’s to come. We may need their currency then.
[after a moment a smile is worn. strained and yet open, friendly. his hand is pulled back. if he’s in pain it no longer shows in his movements as he motions for genya to follow.]
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But he stays quiet, following after the younger boy, hands in his pockets as he walks so he can dig his nails into his palms whenever one of those wounds throbs too much. ]
Tch ... and I bet whatever comes next will be worse than this. Must be the reason why we've been dragged here.
[ Picking up the pace, he falls into step beside Muichiro, ]
Does it talk to you? Your spirit ... demon.
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a quick glance is given to the other boy, a slight tilt of his head in consideration. should he? well the answer wasn't simple.]
In a way. Sometimes. I try to ignore it. But it is very persistent. That leech knows that I would — [he stops there because telling his companion of his own ideas of what he should do if he loses himself again probably wouldn't lead to any pleasant conversation. it could even get to tanjiro. this was a conversation saved to have with the insect pillar.] get rid of it if I could.
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Curious as he is, the young Shinazugawa doesn't press. Just grunts his agreement and nods, adjusting to the rhythm of walking again and shaking off the pangs of pain that come with it. ]
Mine's just anxious all the time. It just keeps telling me there's danger.
[ Which ... well, it was right, but still. ]
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He hears Genya. Anxious? About? There's a fleeting thought: if it made Genya's constitution any different. There's a strange curiosity that led him to believe he would like to get closer. Maybe. See just — wait no that's not. He knows what that is. It's not his own thoughts. Not him wanting a taste of the sea.]
I'll get warnings once in a while. But it's pushing for some partnership.
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But Genya remains blissfully unaware of such things. ]
Partnership? Really?
[ Huh. Though his own youkai seems to be doing the same, it's still a little surprisingly hear. Neither of them are used to such things; demons are always looking to trick. ]
Guess that explains why they live in masks. They need help.
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But this thing?
He keeps walking. Steady. Pain ignored but he almost feels like speaking. Telling Genya. There's something important. But maybe now it would just make things more tense. But did the taller boy know? Did he knows those creatures could take control?]
This is frustrating. I've been thinking about what I should. I want to help but — what am I even?
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[ Genya isn't sure he wants to help, to be honest. There's so much back home he'd been working toward, namely getting stronger and finally being able to meet his brother properly. Here? He just feels stunted, trapped within a cycle, and caught up in a problem he doesn't truly understand.
The Forest Shrine had assured him of that. What happened here? Why? They're questions that don't have answers, least of all the reason why he should help some youkai that just decided to hop on board.
Glancing at the other boy, ]
What do you mean?
[ "What am I even"? Pls don't tell him they're zombies now that they're housing these youkai. ]
no subject
But that did not change the fact that his wasn't sure of the stability of his life. He wasn't bothered by the thought of death. Why should he be? Yet there is no denying the chill that shakes his small frame, unwillingness to repeat the experience or his body protesting? He wants to think it the latter. It's more favorable than the thought of cowardice.]
Before I arrived here, I already experienced death, yet now I find my body whole. I am warm. I can breathe, my heart beats. When I'm wounded I hurt. I'm alive when I shouldn't be. Aside from what I am. What awaits me in the future? And you for that matter. And everyone if there are those who already passed among those who haven't.
no subject
Already experienced death. He doesn't remember hearing about the pillar dying, but also knows that Tokito-san isn't one to lie. And that extra blow—and you. Genya's steps slow for only a moment before he continues on, trudging through the ache with eyes set straight ahead.
Tanjiro had hinted at it. That's all he had needed to do, giving the reassuring words that Sanemi was okay. So, outside of the initial shock, the older boy finds himself ... strangely okay with the strangeness of it all. His apparent death, Tokito-san's apparent death, being here. ]
Are we really sure this isn't the afterlife?
[ With some kind guise from the gods, letting them pretend they're living again, with some kind of duty to attend to? ]
Or some kind of place between the living and the dead. Considering ... y'know.
no subject
He doesn't comprehend what sort of land this is. He doesn't even have an inkling of a clue or suspicion to offer to Genya. After all the youkai, the structures, and the over all technology around them was unfamiliar in a sense. Sure, they may have heard about such creatures in stories by they weren't ever given physical lives. It was as much as their own reality when it came to demons. In their own world people did not know of their existence and they remained nothing more than stories or myths. So then what could this mean?
Reality here was not the one they were acquainted with. He wants to come to some kind of answer, find a conclusion. One he can offer the taller boy, a worthy response that offered some reassurance. But he had nothing.]
I can't say for sure. Or ever why we were the ones brought here.
[More thought given. If they were to give their aid to the people here, even the creatures of this land, or if they were being forced to work with them then surely there were others that were better suited to the task. For if strength is required, maturity, then Muichiro is sure among pillars he is probably one of the weakest. His body was small, young, not fully developed. Though often he was called talented, he didn't have the experience or calming aura men like Himejima-san possessed. Even the elder Shinazugawa might make more of a difference than someone with such small hands as he.]
It seems the choices were made arbitrarily?
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Eyes ahead, he studies the outline of the 7-11 in the distance. ]
... Yeah. I can't imagine why they would pick me over my brother if they had the choice.
[ Sanemi is strong, smart, quick. Everything Genya isn't despite efforts and training under Himejima-san. Sure, they might have been cautious of how Sanemi would respond to youkai, but his brother isn't a cruel man. Only to demons, which these youkai aren't ... necessarily. Oni are still around, but even they're not quite the same.
Shortly, Genya nods. ]
... I guess we'll wait and see. [ he shrugs, trying to work out some of the ache, ] Because the afterlife can't hurt this much, right?
no subject
It's keen interest in certain people, fascination with some scents, and he was sure it hadn't acted all too kindly. It was impossible, and yet, maybe it was right that he didn't have much of a choice but to work with it.]
I'll admit I don't feel suited for this.
It's difficult. And without breathing styles I am not as physically strong after all I am still young and small.
[Right. It's not like there is any other choice aside from that.] It's kind of strange to be able to feel again and to be whole and just being able to exist. I really thought I was moving on. Now I am not even sure if I truly saw what was on the other side.
no subject
Necessary, given everything that's going on. Getting bogged down at this rate will leave him in over his head.
Maybe he shouldn't ask. It's none of his business, it's not as though they're particularly close, but the words slip out anyway, quietly, ]
What did you see?